Oh Good... Christmas!!
Can't wait for the annual orgy of uber consumption, the joy of hackneyed conversations, and the same old, same old script required to deal with celebration of New Year...pass me a Mogodon on your way out will you? I'm particularly fond of the trite, stale ditties omnipresent everywhere: supermarkets, tv, radio, cafes, shopping centres...there is literally no escape from Shaky Stevens, Paul McFartney, that band...'Sludge'...And there's the imterminable shop shop shop shop shopping...take my family for example....teenagers are grossly offensive, and no quantity of logoed tat is sufficient to sate their disgusting insecurity, but what excuse do the others have?They're just as demanding...
A distant relative collects £5 fom each of her brood and posts to a worthy cause...sweet joy and job
accomplished!! I suggested this as an alternative to the pain, the suggestion lingered
sulphourously smelly in the air...unacknowledged. Mind you this lady is a ruthless example, upon being confronted by yet another mound of unwashed crockery and dirthy undepants, she collected the major effects of each of her offspring, packed the items in spotted hankerchiefs, and left them on the table with written notification of 28 days to vacate the family home. Moving on...the aquisition and prep of food and the people carrier borrowed just for the alcohol shop ...unsurprisingly given the gluttony my beloveds and I suffer various maladies exclusive to these days...(apart from mental disorders...that is a future blogsworth) mostly these illnesses fall into the 'sticky blood' family, giveaway signs to be noted are beer bellies (I have 3) and other image compromising conditions such as large bottoms, pendulous bingo wings, and purpley veined noses, but the invisible stuff is the worst: lethally high levels of triglycerates and cholesteol and a marked shortness of breath when negotiating the kitchen, and yet, although we think we want to live forever, we deliberately stuff our morbidly fat faces with tens of thousands too many calories (wrecking our livers which are probably drowning in wine beer and spirits) just to make it to the other side of the glumness that is 'indoors with relatives'.Cigarettes are smoked just to leave the house, (I'm on 30 a day during confinement season, normally a pack of 10 lasts a week.) all enjoyed without giving a penny to charity (I don't, couldn't beleive it when I found out the other day that most 'charities' are industries that have the cheek to emply highly salaried execs)Still, getting things into perspective...as long as I can avoid the sustained misery of 'Eastenders'then life should remain tolerable....
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